i want to move on..

ffffound

every time i want to remember you..
i close my eyes..
i haven't seen you in so long..

i close my eyes..
remembering images..memories..pictures..
the first thing that i remember
is that picture of you..
wearing that dark blue hat..outside of starbux...
u were wearing a beige sweater..
and had a thicker beard then usual..
i remember your gaze in the picture
i feel like that picture spoke to me..
calling out for me..
i longed to be there with you
i long to be with you..

i daydream all the time..
most of my day im thinking of you..
my mind keeps drifting to you..

i get mad at myself..
im forgetting
i dont want to forget..
i dont remember anymore..
it was so long ago..
it hurts so much that i dont remember..

i forgot so many things..
but what i will always have is the way that u made me feel..

i feel small and inadequate now..
no one has ever made me feel that special..

i close my eyes again..
thinking of you..
looking so handsome.
you hugged me so tight
that u cried..
i couldn't believe it u cried..

i long for that hug
i long for that day

its not healthy to think about u like this..
i cant help myself..
i try
i try

till today songs on the radio remind me of you.
i cant even listen to them..
it hurts so bad..

i wish that one day you pick up the fone and call me..
and tell me
that you miss me
and that you will always love me..

its pathetic that i still have hope..
i wait for news that you guys ended ur marriage.
i know thats mean..
but i think that we are meant to be..
and that we are destined to be together..

so naive..
i think deep down im still that naive girl..
yearning for love and attention..

in my sleep i usually wake up with tears..
another day without you..
do you know that ever day i look at my fone
hoping for a msg a call anything from you

every day i wake up a little bit disappointed
every night i dream of you and hope that you come back..

i am lost without you
i am not complete..

if i hear someone talk like that id think there so corny
im not usually the romantic mushy type..
this is from my heart..

i dream of you
i wait for you
i long for you
i am still madly deeply in love with you..

to my sadness and despair..this is still the case..

dear god..please get me out of this..
i want to be ok
i want to move on..

i will go to bed..
still with hope in my heart..